WHY MOLLY KNOT

a slice of mind a twisting spine popping the top I already know what it’s like because I’ve been dead forever just a coincidence maybe maybe-not who told you I know what it’s like outside to refer to its certified classification one never knows when it comes or where it goes of unknown origins spike a memory 2^nd line round the razor tip of an old ugly spear piercing energy rush unlimited with an incorrect word out of place innocent in the way God Bless / Jesus Saves the last noodle boiled into coagulated mucus mental inception from beyond issue must have been what was said “that’s that again” pick up some better luck next time then is will always be as I’ve seen it dead forever again again already gone off to everlasting paradise shopping cart full of faith in a mystery stain cumshot crusty gun mother of funny stuck at the intersection of nowhere & other

the story is the story start from the beginning

begin at the last page and work backwards in back words from a raw transcendent bliss with Strawhat Charlotte who smelled like garlic snuck into a (won’t forget) PT Anderson tribute Hard Eight : Boogie Nights : There Will Be Blood : The Master : each one after another to another to another looping through a finite stream of light and electricity

I’ve read the dialogue from voice over to subtitle still can’t make it make sense and I wake up in the middle of a life shining itself paper thin like a screenscript on acid dipped in pure euphoria something to keep the heart beating while murdering consciousness at its core where it stands stretching insanity to the brink payment on loan from an underground shadow sector I mean who hasn’t killed Jesus once or twice the center edge inverted inside everything defined by the Anti-Sign…

I promise when this is over a total noetic unity nor “clotted liquid dung”  I need three years to finish this hedonistic trip mainline no one else behind or ahead of me empty horizons like key lime pie ubiquitous directions on fire leave the beans paralyzed by midnight oh yeah the Story Chapter Epilogue Footnote (don’t forget the Title) rearview conclusions adopted abandoned erased in the unspoken code of freedom agreed to in theory yet never felt in flesh

opening my eyes during a very real moment perceive the form from which it derives

power connecting dots in a linear arc through Yeats to the Beats and back again if you’re not learning you’re not living oh the Sound the sound of sounds a long miracle list  giant hodgepodge collage of human history so easy to say every perspective of our collective on display 360 degrees a panoramic brain scope sizing up again and again where it’s going from where it’s been speaking of a world within splintered tongues betrayed by a kiss to lick heal deep lethal wounds scars left behind by war sister nations giving birth to inevitable extinction jealousy reigning over expected reactions a natural response to the given assumptions divided by time despite the conjunctive clause in the original contract keeping any fear aside from the matter at hand madcow foot mouth eat that grin off your face or else taste the consequences –

an organic reality linked between cause and effect chains of ideas preserved in order generation to generation repeated for no other reason but to generate momentum as some things flow alone in the zone elevated to the peak of uncertainty a common misconception of what it means to see through the surface I’m compelled to tell of what I remember hearing a group of small children singing while waiting for a bus

“a snitch in a casket like a brick in a basket pawned to the Army as an orphan whose only purpose is to curse existence for being nothing more than a cruel joke played on the poor broken souls clinging to the unlikely hope that all will be forgiven”

DEAD LETTER

when I look at the world I see literature... / superfeta #285 /
and maybe just maybe black people shouldn't be owned like property by white people and yes maybe just maybe a green weed that if smoked makes people happy content peaceful and relieved of pain anxiety fear shouldn't be criminalized with there being so many guns in circulation and corrupt politicians bribed by greedy bankers and freedom hating judges Congratulations America there is hope yet:
now all you need to do is to stop believing in an innocent dude who was murdered for walking on water turning shit into wine and subverting authority and you might literally avoid being conquered by extraterrestrial aliens of the 3rd gNarf sector:
not to mention but speaking of which if the range of God's test of Man's faith in him runs from Adam and the Apple to Abraham and Isaac to Job to Daniel to Jesus and Paul all the way up through History and including the Holocaust then it's safe to say he's a motherfucking asshole...
"O you hypocrites, O you whited sepulchres, O you who present a smooth smiling face to the world while your soul within is a foul swamp of sin, how will it fare with you in that terrible day?  And this day will come shall come must come; the day of death and the day of judgement. It is appointed unto man to die and after death judgement. Death is certain. The time and manner are uncertain, whether from long disease or from some unexpected accident; the Son of God cometh at an hour when you little expect Him. Be therefore ready every moment, seeing that you may die at any moment. Death is the end of us all. Death and judgement, brought into the world by the sin of our first parents, are the dark portals that close our earthly existence, the portals that open into the unknown and the unseen, portals through which every soul must pass, alone unaided save by its good works, without friend or brother or parent or master to help it, alone and trembling. Let that thought be ever before our minds and then we cannot sin. Death, a cause of terror to the sinner, is a blessed moment for him who has walked in the right path, fulfilling the duties of his station in life, attending to his morning and evening prayers, approaching the holy sacrament frequently and performing good and merciful works."

- Joyce, A Portrait Of The Artist As A Young Man

WORLD WAR ME

all of philosophy poetry verse based creativity is a long list of words attempting to describe what life truth time being reality self is not in order to reveal in the mind of the reader what it is:
Nietzsche murdered the word at its very source by which I mean he destroyed the hypnotic trance or blind faith control most people use to guide their souls through a language maze riddled in tangible illusions and dead image space...
(what a way to go more whiskey less war)
Nietzsche applied in a sense what Marx said about Religion to all of Modern Society Culture Science Politics the grassroots thought channel bar shot chatter exchanged between slush heads full of talk rot doesn't matter wherever there is raw language engaged in authority supporting power structure operating unilaterally above those who are willing to submit to and follow in conformity all mob wranglers obsessed with attention taking their trust in advantage to gain personally at an expense and detriment of the species thus begins the end of the 2nd Coming...

The Final Dive [when] is it the ego's transcendence of itself that presents the world or is it the world that becomes its other through perceptions of the ego's reflection upon it? "Well I began analyzing it - my imagination persisted in sticking horrors into the dark so I stuck my imagination into the dark instead and let it look out at me - I let it play stray dog or escaped convict or ghost and then saw myself coming along the road.  That made it all right - as it always makes every thing all right to project yourself completely into another place"

- Fitzgerald, This Side Of Paradise

OTHER KILL MINE

a poetic jam of unbeing stream of dead words speaking to the darkness silence is the tongue of light
eternal
universal
absolute
not unlike Being isn't a product of an idea or theory
laws are for idiotic halfheads who believe cheating is ok as long as you're not caught
no system or privilege of freedom is a purer form of existence all and every to each of one in their own as it is for a moment:
just imagine if Life stopped and asked "what is the meaning of you?"
what would you say...
alive
dying
dead
it doesn't matter Man is created in his own image with an incomplete language caught in a mind warp word loop empty bubble pop rock sun shot "In fact, I am then plunged into the world of objects; it is they which constitute the unity of my consciousness it is they which present themselves with values, with attractive and repellent qualities- but me, I have disappeared; I have annihilated myself. There is no place for me on this level. And this is not a matter of chance, due to a momentary lapse of attention, but happens because of the very structure of consciousness."
- Sartre, The Transcendence of the Ego
the new underground smells like a rusty bung hole plugged solid with rotten toxic mushtots just as some have thought or what of it the big end 7 to go or maybe 6 until the final dive driving off into the sunset once and for all when that was enough don't ask Nietzsche for a ride who only knew that War is best better than sex killing trumps fucking any day of the week more potent than truth or wild drug rush higher than Life itself silly stump questions oh so much to say before:
love is an illusion between gods who murder their own sons for fun who pimp married women and rape little children oh what a crock of it everything comes to be as soon as you realize it's already over...

WHEN ONCE WAS ALL

to think imagine believe that all the evil terror suffering murder rape violence war fraud lying theft waste destruction greed tyranny holocaust genocide weapons of annihilation abuse addiction delusion all of it the darkness abyss void uncertainty negative dying light anti-mind confusion wrong way no how the end of everything an unnecessary death that all of this could be in the one i nothing more than fear 
of Love:

to be afraid of loving as much as being loved by another and from fear we watch witness notice observe the world strangled choking on a chicken bone... 
I don't want to be remembered this way and I'm sick of waiting 8 weeks 8 weeks 
to think imagine wonder consider contemplate decide preserve communicate

what words have done with silence –

what language has done with words –

what story has done with language –

what religion has done with story –

what poetry has done with religion –

what philosophy has done with poetry –

what science has done with philosophy –

what technology has done with science –

what society has done with technology –

what money has done with society –

what time is doing with money –

what silence will do with time…“Basically, cancer is scary, but some kinds may be more boogeyman-in-the-closet scary than serial killer scary. To understand fully, you have to look at the history of cancer diagnosis, Brawley says. In the 1850s, a group of German pathologists did some of the first biopsies on people who had clearly died of cancer. They took samples of their tumors and decided what breast cancer looks like, what lung cancer looks like, etc. Today, Brawley says, there is a patient who has a lesion that's approximately 5 millimeters in diameter -- smaller than a pea. There's a doctor taking a biopsy of that lesion and a pathologist who's analyzing the sample using 21st-century technology. The problem, Brawley says, is that they're still comparing the samples to the cancer definition that was created more than 150 years ago. It's an issue many people have difficulty wrapping their heads around: Some patients who are diagnosed with cancer do not need to be treated, because that cancer is never going to bother them. The problem is that we don't know who those people are.”
By Jacque Wilson and Amanda Enayati “Overtested Americans: when cancer isn’t cancer at all”

MAD STATE

"what will you have"
"whiskey and water"

"how do you suppose to teach them to un-learn the insanity of the world as the only one they know"
"you mean how is one cured of the self once it's believed to be real"

"howdy Gents what will it be"
"oh we're not together"
"I'm waiting for someone"
"I'll have another whiskey and water"
"nice talking with you maybe I'll see you later"
"ok baby be good"

"is this seat taken"
"no it's all yours"
"ok bartender I'll have a vodka and coke and a little ice"
"so what brings you in"
"I gave a book reading tonight at the college here in town"
"no shit how did it go"
"well the audience was attentive and courteous and it all went just as I thought it would"
"then it was a success"
"yes yes quite right"
"to success"
"to success"
"so what's the book about"
"I used to to an exterminator"
"a bugman"
"yes a bugman"
"bang any horny housewives"
"fortunately I did not"
"oh ok then"
"no in that line of work I was mostly alone in basements attics behind the garage bulkheads never really got around to lining the bedroom"
"yeah sure I just thought maybe you'd gotten lucky"
"nope and I've never much relied on luck"
"really"
"Nietzsche says the outcome of one's life is the result of his own will and ultimate intention"
"yeah but Nietzsche was a certified gertrude"
"a certified what"
"a loony madcap I mean by the end he was totally bonkers"
"yes well the truth can do that to a man"
"not with one of these in my hand bartender another round for me and my friend"
"as often is the case only the insane can see the truth for what it is because logic leads back in a circle to uncertainty and every answer begets another question endlessly until the mind is tied up in a knot"
"or decides to jump off a bridge"
"oh alcohol helps to suspend the conflict briefly in some but to survive the ongoing challenge of life eventually the mind must face the light"
"fucking bugs"
"not much a man can do against the light"
"the needle"
"well well what do you know and how do you do my name is Bill"
"Hank"
"bartender..."

AS I DIE LAUGHING

stop and imagine how you'll be remembered and you'll quickly wish to be forgotten
like a disaster waiting to happen.
one more whiskey and no more war.
please don't worry.
I'm nothing.
but this is how it should be:

Apocalypse Not
(the Reduz that never was)
Directed by Aronofsky
starring:
Gandolfini as Col. Kurtz
LeBeouf as Capt. Willard
O. Wilson as Kilgore
and Depp as Hopper's Character the Photojournalist

oh fuck me right too late unless we get Willis to gain some pounds or maybe Rogen is free to grease the noodles...

ok ok bad idea fucking stupid but how about this:
a Mockumentary of the making of a Good Will Hunting remake
Written by Kevin Smith
Directed by Ben Affleck
starring:
Matt Damon as Will
Johnny Knoxville as Ben Affleck
Austin Powers as Robin Williams
Peter Sarsgaard as himself
and if Mini Driver isn't available then Mila Kunis or Juno...

I let the words worry about what they mean if this shit writes itself I wonder who is it for? "words are no good" well then what kind of war are you trying to win blame of me for what again? died for me from who? I don't think it's right to make me receive any thing by someone innocent being crucified. all wrong and makes no sense. all wrong so it can't be but not much of but another book full of killing time with is what I see...